Mini Stories: Faith Lost?

Edbucfuq

Before meeting that particular person, she was able to prayer and managed to behave correctly with others. She always found time to dedicate to her Lord and loved performing supererogatory acts of worship. She always thanked God with whatever He gave her let it be bad or good because she knew that one day she would be rewarded with better gifts from the Almighty.

Few months after her marriage, she was no longer able to pray regularly. There were days when she thought Islam was oppressing her. If she prayed, she did hastily. Found that time went so fast. So many things to do and yet not much time available. Between her husband and her child, she lost herself. Thought that if there was a little time why not use it for her instead of her Lord.

One day, she stopped everything and meditated: “Why am I not able to be as pious as I were before being married to that man? Is it my fault or am I with the wrong person? Long ago, no matter what trials befell on me, I thanked God and could be strong thanks to His help. Now I have distanced myself from Him, I sometimes hate His religion. I have the feeling I lost all the knowledge I had of Islam. I am lost in this marriage. I heard that a Muslim should watch out who he/she mixes with because one person is enough to bring the best out of you or to awakenΒ  the worst out of you. But on the other hand, Allah says

Do the people think that they will be left to say, “We believe” and they will not be tried?But We have certainly tried those before them, and Allah will surely make evident those who are truthful, and He will surely make evident the liars. {Surah 29; verse 2-3 }

I am scared that I might be a hypocrite. I don’t know wether I am with the wrong person or wether my marriage is a test to reveal that I am not a truthful believer.

Β© Fateema Abdallah

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10 thoughts on “Mini Stories: Faith Lost?

  1. Assalamu alekum sister…I know marriage comes with so many responsibilities…but our Allah swt is so great that he said even to take care of your child your husband mother father etc is also a good deed…and I believe when we start finding his blessings in each of our task, we surely enjoy doing his ibadat and our imaan also enhances. So rather than getting irritated with the household work we need to find his blessings.

    • Walaykum salam sister, indeed in our daily routine we tend to forget that each good act gets rewarded. I will keep it in mind and should get myself informed more about this because my iman is really low nowadays.

  2. Assalamu’alaikum my sister! πŸ™‚ I’m sure you’re a righteous woman sis! There is always chance to make ourselves better. I’m struggling with that, to make my life better. Thank you for sharing this, Sis!

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